ATTERCOP


Uncanny Recount (?!)

Oh man. I really gotta try to keep up dudes…

So, school year’s runnin’ down and I’m BUSY BUSY BUSY. But with good things! Promise!

I’m currently flirting with a particular college here in Georgia. It likes me, I like it and hey, I know this particular university lives a little far away but I’m willing to travel if you know what I mean…

And what I mean is that I’m am literally willing to travel. To this college.

It’s hard really. To keep a blog and a journal. Because I have a journal. A real journal, with paper and ink and a book mark built into it.

Good advice I think... on the cover there.

Good advice I think... on the cover there.

Built in bookmark FTW

Built in bookmark FTW

Sometimes blogging feel so ephemeral. Like, by writing something down in a book it really is saved forever. A real autobiography. I mean, over the course of my years I’ve filled up a good many journals.

from December 25, 2002 to April 23, 2009

from December 25, 2002 to April 23, 2009

My first journal entry ever was written in what I considered very fancy Middle Earth talk (which in my twelve year old mind meant using the words “recount” and “uncanny” a lot) about how awesome Metroid Fusion is.

My recent one was a very vague mentioning about my car wreck and my desire to do a triptych featuring kissing and lines from Romeo & Juliet. How not as exciting.

But, reading through my old journals from sixteen to seventeen to eighteen I realizee I was a very romantic boy, very disinterested in sex and very lonely. I saw the whole of gay society as being dominated by meaningless sex and superficial materialistic values. Which, it pretty much is, but now I know that there are a few others out there like me. Men who want what throbs in the ribs rather than what throbs in the pants, who want forehead kisses more than blow jobs. Men who don’t see the world and as a giant bus station who’s job  it is to transport pleasure to them.

Still, there are few.  But I’m proud to have self control and mastery over my desires. I value serenity and hard work over immediate, flimsy pleasure and empty materialism.  I think I’m far more Buddist than I’ll ever be willing to admit.

That’s probably something that needs to get recorded into my real journal.

It’s funny. I sort of have this idea that in the future people will find my journals and try to put together who I was. Or maybe I’ll go through them and use them to write a memoir. Augustan Burroughs style.

Oh well, in Art News (which I know is pretty much all you people actually care about reading about) I’m working on a series of paintings/mixed media projects interpreting Leaves of Grass through mythical symbols or something like that. You’ve already seen one of these paintings. However not in its completed state.

More to come.

-Joshua

P.S. Hi everyone who’s come over from Letnaturebe! Rather surprised you’ve migrated (of course not really migrated, I couldn’t stop reading LNB if I wanted to!) but I’m glad you’re here! 🙂


3 Comments so far
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oh josh, journals are what great things come from…i dont know what I typed that.
but anyways journals release the mind of “crazzzy” thoughts…which sometimes I think the crazy people are the sane people and all what is known to be sane is what crazy really is…if you catch my drift..I probably make no sense at the moment…oh well.
I started journaling when I was 10…I lost the journal when I was in middle school…which shouldnt matter because it was all on pointless stuff like “I dont want braces” and having a crush on this “curly blonde hair kid”
but looking at some of the journal from middle school I wrote some pretty dark Sh*t I mean really…
and any ways journaling is great though I was told to never read your old journal but burn them so you dont have to look back on those things that brought you a down or stuck

– kinset

Comment by that strange girl in almost all of your classes

What you said “But, reading through my old journals from sixteen to seventeen to eighteen I realizee I was a very romantic boy, very disinterested in sex and very lonely. I saw the whole of gay society as being dominated by meaningless sex and superficial materialistic values. Which, it pretty much is, but now I know that there are a few others out there like me. Men who want what throbs in the ribs rather than what throbs in the pants, who want forehead kisses more than blow jobs. Men who don’t see the world and as a giant bus station who’s job it is to transport pleasure to them.”

That’s me. A romantic thrown in a confusing world of perverts. I enjoyed reading this, I’m currently working on a large 9x6ft painting that incorporates my thoughts and symbols.

Comment by victorreese

Don’t worry. Like your journal says: “Don’t panic!” College will be fun. Throbs in chest instead of throbs in pants. (May I say that now? In conversation? Because it’s awesome!)

As far as journalling goes, good for you. I have a many multitude of physical journals (and internet journals, too) that have a few pages in the beginning scribbled on, and then blankness. O, how the blankness mocks me. However, I now have many journal-style notes on Facebook, and livejournal, so, yeah. My name is Sarah, and I am a recovering anti-wishy-washy-journalist. (Everyone says, “Hi, Sarah.”)

Comment by Sarah




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